09.01.08 Regarding Kobe

Greetings from your humble narrator! I’m nursing a bit of a cold, and it sucks. Though, I’m not one to let my public down. I’m just like Kobe Bryant. Kobe wouldn’t let torn ligaments in his pinkie stop him, and I won’t let a cold stop me. It’s obviously the same thing. Considering all of this, I thought I would throw out some thoughts on The Black Mamba.

Kobe Bryant may be the most controversial player in the NBA today, and perhaps of all time. As Kobe once said in a commercial a few years ago, fans either love Kobe or hate him. The fans that love Kobe will never give an inch on their praise, and neither will the opposite side with their venom.

You could argue that Kobe Bryant was the biggest steal in draft history. He fell all the way to number thirteen, when he was selected by the Charlotte Hornets in the 1996 draft. For a point of reference, Erick Dampier was taken with the tenth pick. In one of the most lopsided trades in history, Kobe was sent to the Lakers in exchange for Vlade Divac. The then General Manager of the Lakers, Jerry West, thought he would make a strong second option behind the newly acquired Shaquille O’Neal.

The first few years of Kobe’s existence in Los Angeles were good or bad, depending on your perspective. Kobe was being compared to a young Michael Jordan and Shaq had grown into the best center in the league. The two superstars managed to make the playoffs for their first three seasons, but were spanked by the Jazz and Spurs each time. The Lakers brought into Phil Jackson once his year long sabbatical after leaving the Chicago Bulls, and we all know the rest.

We all know about the three championships and Kobe and Shaq’s feud. We can all remember how ugly it had gotten. What am I talking about? It’s still ugly. When you have Shaq free stylin’ in New York about how Kobe can’t win without him, four years after the split, it feels like a divorced couple.

Kobe may have done some image rehab over the past year, but the funny thing is, as ridiculous as it was, Shaq was right. That’s right, I said it! I’m not saying that Kobe is incapable of winning a championship unless he plays with Shaq. It would take the biggest Shaq fan in the world to deny that Kobe Bryant isn’t looking a hell of a lot better than Shaq these days. Though, Shaq was still right. To this date, Kobe Bryant has yet to win a championship without Shaquille O’Neal.

Shaq won his post-Kobe ring, even if he should be thanking Dwyane Wade every time he looks at it. Shaq has been in a championship parade that didn’t involve Kobe Bryant. Kobe has yet to have a parade where Shaq wasn’t involved, and until he does, he’ll never be his own player.

Kobe Bryant is as talented as any player in the history of basketball. Still, there’s always a catch with him. The guy is a three time champion; he’s won the MVP award, has two scoring titles and has the second highest single game scoring performance in NBA history. Though, with all of that, Kobe is defined by not being Michael Jordan or not being the best player on those championship teams.

The two chances Kobe has had to prove himself truly worthy of being placed along side Magic, Larry or Michael, against the Pistons in 2004 and the Celtics in 2008, he failed. He won scoring titles, but then was knocked out in the first round of the playoffs. He won an MVP trophy, but was then outplayed in the Finals by Paul Pierce. He won championships, but he wasn’t the man on those teams.

I believe this is Kobe’s history so far. I do not believe this will be Kobe’s story forever. Am I wrong?

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08.27.08 Top 5 Most Annoying Players

Considering I spent the last week listing NBA nicknames, without having the stones to rank them, I figured I would throw out a Top 5 list today. I sat at my computer trying to think of some list different than “Top 5 Players of whatever” I decided maybe I should go negative. It’s working for John McCain, why not me? I couldn’t go with “Top 5 Worst Players in the NBA” because if we get to watch them, they’re not the worst players in the NBA. So, I decided I would pick the five players that I find the most annoying to watch. The guys that when they walk on the court you want to throw anything you can grab at the TV.

5. Allen Iverson, Denver Nuggets

Allen Iverson may be the best little man to ever play the game, but every time I see him I think of the player that mainly was the cause of the NBA becoming the place of the punk kids that make millions and have no respect. There’s no doubt that Allen Iverson is an extremely tenacious player, but would Michael Jordan or Bill Russell ever openly complain about having to go to practice?

4. Brad Miller, Sacramento Kings

I know people say not to judge a book by its cover, but if you were to look at Brad Miller no one would ever think he was a professional basketball player. He looks more like the guy who sells you tools at Home Depot. Whenever I see him play I think “There’s the new NBA logo right there!” If Brad Miller can play basketball, maybe Kobe Bryant and LeBron James really aren’t that great of athletes, just better than people like Brad Miller.

3. Deshawn Stevenson, Washington Wizards

I’m listing Deshawn Stevenson because of him mouthing off about LeBron James. I’m listing Deshawn Stevenson because he mouthed off to anyone that wasn’t named Earl Boykins. Actually, even that would’ve been going too far. Anytime an average player calls one of the premier players in the league “overrated” that average player is an idiot. When your career average in 8.7 ppg you have no room criticizing a player who’s racked up a career average to the tune of 27.3 ppg. It’s not about LeBron James, if Deshawn had bashed Boris Diaw he would’ve been out of line. Plus, you’re trademark is a hand gesture lifted from a wrestler? Seriously?

2. Jason Terry, Dallas Mavericks

I never really cared about Jason Terry until three years ago. Back when the Mavericks went to seven game with the Spurs, whenever Jason Terry would be interviewed I’d turn the TV on mute. He talks about faith and tries to sound like the good and hard working player, but I’ve never bought it. He’s either both lying and being too over the top with it, or he’s telling the truth and he’s just an over the top person. Either way, he’s that guy you work with you don’t want to sit by in the break room. You know who I mean…

1. Sasha Vujacic, Los Angeles Lakers

How could I not rank this guy as #1? From his rat-looking face(maybe a little harsh) to his annoying chest pounding, this guy sucks. He’s a good player, no doubt. He can shoot a mean three point shot, but I always root against the Lakers because of this guy. The last guy in the NBA I want to see wearing an NBA ring is Sasha Vujacic. If he does win a ring my hopes of him going to Europe, where I’ll never have to see him again, greatly diminish. How about this for a new rule? If you average less than ten points a game, you can’t show off, ever. If you do, you get an immediate ejection. Take note David Stern!

That’s it for today. I’ll see you guys Friday!

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